His Dream’s My Nightmare


(Here are the choices:  On left is a snazzy 18-wheeler he’s itchin’ to get his hands on…The van below it could be the compromise-vehicle.  But, be assured:  we’re not a fringe group, considering doing this, for a good percentage of us are taking to the road, in campers and RV’s  to see our country…before we make the Final Run to the nursing homes….)

I’ve shared before as to how I’m consumed with an idea to “simplify”  (Click on link to see earlier post on this topic.) To that effect, I’d like to divest myself of all household possessions that call for upkeep, investment, general maintenance.  In other words, I want to walk away from responsibilities and see the world… going out first to my own country.

Yes, I want to travel America.  I want to see it from its little towns, you know, the way Sarah Palin was supposed to do, but without the hoopla and fanfare associated with her (whatever happened to that bus tour anyway?)

Husband and I are presently disagreeing as to how we can pull this pull off. For instance, he wants to buy an 18-wheeler (they cost about $130,000 for the cab alone–the power unit that‘s also called a ‘tractor‘), fit it out with bed, refrigerator, TV, etc. and become truckers of high-performance, expensive cars (or other goods that command top  price for transport).  In other words, we’d go into business for ourselves.

He knows there’s high demand for these services and having been a trucker, he thinks it would be a great way for us to (1) Get paid well for our services and (2) See the country at the same time.

He wants me to take a truck driver course so I can get a CDL license.

Here’s my problem:  I have trouble backing up a car, never mind a 70-foot, fully-loaded, tractor trailer.  Put an expensive, show vehicle on it and my panic mode would shoot through the roof (of formerly-mentioned cab).

Oh, he’s tried to make me see his sensibility:  “Colleen, we could see the country on someone else’s dime.”

He sees us traversing the Rockies, the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, touting our partner in this Grand Design, the truck. It’s the nomadic life he’s always envisioned (if his rebel spirit admits,) but now, he’d bring his mate–me– with him (he did this trucking life, ‘solitary,’ for 27 years).

What do I see in my mind’s eye? I see our backside (of the trailer) hanging out over the roadbed as I make those hairpin curves or use up all lanes, in the process, thus inviting a head-on collision. I see us grinding to a halt on snow-slicked roads, in acres of bumper-to-bumper traffic, our motor running at $4.95 per gallon for diesel fuel.

I see ice on those same roadways transform us into a hurtling menace capable of inflicting incredible damage, impossible to stop.

I see the yahoos of the road who jump in front of us at a moment’s notice, causing the driver to slam on the brakes.  A further problem here?  This baby carries 76,000 lbs. of cargo, so stopping on a dime is never easy.

And yes, there’s the age factor. We’d be doing this difficult job at the more advanced ages of 66 and 70 (mine and his), when reaction time is altered and vision has deteriorated.

So, we discuss and discuss, as we grow even older, for I know he’s not the realist I am.  He still sees himself at his own top speed, having suffered no decline. In his mind, he’s still the Great Plains Cowboy who herded those giant steel, motorized beasts across the country’s expanse, doing it handily, and often alone.

Now, he wants to share the journey with me.

So, I say this:  Contact us if you need a vehicle moved from one end of the country to another. Yes, that’s right…I agree to try it. If we live to  be 90 (my own Mom lived to be 92), we’ve got 25+ years of moving cargo ahead of us. Husband says it can be a 4th. career for both of us.

We’ll start out slow as in ‘No heavy investment to begin with” (that‘s why we‘ll move your vehicles from one end of the country to another, to see how I like it.)  And since today’s computers allow for WiFi chip, I’ll write my stories and plug into the internet when I’m not driving.

“Shhhhh….I think  I hear “Rawhide‘s“ “Get those doggies rolling” playing in the back of my mind (click on for nostalgia.)

***Now, how about you?  “Got your own ideas about seeing this country (you know, sort of the way the motorcyclists did in “Easy Rider,” but without the sad end result for Peter Fonda), traveling across its vast expanse?”  “Have you done it?”…or (like us) “Are you planning on doing it?”

By the way, the van, above, is the smaller RV, a Pleasure-Way– probably what we’re seriously gonnna buy for us to tour this country, but we won’t be hauling freight (unless it’s our own,) and I like that idea just fine.

About admin

A lifetime teacher and realtor who's now a published writer, Colleen Kelly Mellor is a humorist first, ever aware of the thread that connects us all. Her works have appeared in the WSJ, Providence Journal, and CNN and NY Times-acclaimed medical blog, kevinMD.com, to name a few. All material on this blog is exclusive property of the author and cannot be reproduced without this author's express written consent.
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