“Do I Really Want to Sell?” “Of Course (Not)!”

Here’s the house I took on alone, weeks after my fiancee died. I’ve owned it 20 years (ironically, those became some of the best years of my life.) I’m worried, however, for I think I suffer separation-anxiety already…More pix below.

I’m selling my house in Warwick, Rhode Island, and we’re getting it all spiffed up to present to the public. Since I’m a retired realtor, I’m putting it on the market as a “For Sale By Owner” (known as FSBO, or FIS-BO, in the trade), even though I shudder at what I’ll encounter.

For instance, I know someone will say: “Well, the pool’s definitely NOT something we want,” (acting as if they’ll try hard to overcome their aversion), while I inwardly fume, “Then, why are you here?”

The 20X40’ pool with new cobalt blue and white liner and fresh coupling sits in idyllic park-like grounds and it is definitely a huge selling point, in my estimation. It sits dead-center in the yard, as my home’s signature asset.

Oh, I include photos of the pool and the house, below, but to give you a small sample (since you aren’t actually here to see in person), my mother’s reaction when she first saw my home? “Oh, Colleen, this is so-o beautiful. It looks like those estates in Bel Air, California, where the movie stars live” (even if it’s a really tiny version of those.)

My father who had shades of Alzheimer’s at the time, merely asked, “Colleen, who lives here?” When I told him “I do,” he sarcastically said, “OH, sure you do,” as if he knew THAT could never be. I took this as another huge compliment (I’m a half-full glass kind of person.)

Translation: MY new home passed the sniff test: Both parents were duly impressed. But I digress….

I didn’t need to wait long to get properly annoyed. The neighbor down the street popped in as soon as my sign went up, saying her son and his wife might be interested, if only for my home’s proximity to her own (living next to mother-in-law would be a deal-breaker for me). She said the pool was a big deterrent, however, suggesting they might overcome that hurdle if the price were dropped substantially ( I kid you not!).

So, my house wasn’t on market an hour and I was already freaking out (inwardly, of course.)

That same afternoon people began pulling up curbside, in cars, to sit and stare. Because I was feeling violated, I took to walking about the back property, trying to fend off the feeling my home was being stalked. I could imagine the in-car conversation: “Too many trees” (said by the man who no longer wants to rake and bag), while she doubtless answered: “We can hire that out.”

As I meandered about my tiny estate, I weighed its positives: The graceful Greco-Roman statues of women that stand about and adorn the pool area, just like those of classic eras….the landscaped yard replete with gardens and wrought iron gates….the huge feathery balsams that sway as backdrop, and the ever-so-cute white brick potting shed that stands in the midst of them, inviting a gardener’s wares (tho’ I never used.)

In other words, the whole place has a Zen effect (so it’s Asian, too.)

As to its interior, it has oversized doorways, entranceways or exits. Corridors are overwide, as well, giving the feeling that even though it’s 1680 feet above grade (with full, huge basement), it feels spacious and airy. We recently repainted the rooms in Pottery Barn colors (remember–I’m a realtor) and the kitchen sports modern touches of stainless steel and granite. Oversized picture windows front two lawns, making it bright and open on the darkest of days, and it sits on over a half-acre of land.

I know for a fact my house is one the following groups will LOVE: older people who want one-floor living, small families with children who know how to swim well, the physically-challenged, practically anyone in the gay community (because they have great taste!) or a single person with enough money to hire out the various jobs that need doing.

But I can’t advertise it as such (un-PC).

Who shouldn’t apply: A person who wants to negotiate as if the home’s got a serious impediment. Or one who offers she’s “willing to take it off my hands.” Why? I love this house and I only want a buyer who will love it as much as we do (sounds like I‘m trying to find a home for my beloved pet–doesn‘t it?).

In the meantime, I’ll await my buyer with my less-than-enthusiastic heart.

If you’re interested in seeing my home, give me a shout or send this out to anyone you think might be via buttons below…You’ll find my regular e-mail address by clicking onto “Biddy Bytes and Its Author, Colleen Kelly Mellor,” in picture banner running across this website. Once on that page, scroll down to the bottom.

And now, some have told me that I really need to make a change to the sign gracing the lawn and add my phone number. As it currently is, a potential buyer has no way to contact me.

Think that’s intentional?

***Check out the pictures of my home at 121 Overhill Road, Warwick, RI. It’ll have its own website soon and be in MLS (Multiple Listing Service,) but I wanted to give you, my readers, first crack at it. I told you: “I want my home to go to someone I care about.”






About admin

A lifetime teacher and realtor who's now a published writer, Colleen Kelly Mellor is a humorist first, ever aware of the thread that connects us all. Her works have appeared in the WSJ, Providence Journal, and CNN and NY Times-acclaimed medical blog, kevinMD.com, to name a few. All material on this blog is exclusive property of the author and cannot be reproduced without this author's express written consent.
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